Tips to Improve Your Self Esteem

Self-love and self-esteem are the building blocks for personal growth. For people who struggle with forward momentum, achieving their goals, or finding happiness, the missing piece may be valuing yourself and viewing yourself as worthy of investing time and energy into.

First off, what is Self-esteem? It can be defined as how you view yourself and the value you place on your well-being and satisfaction. This is not limited to liking how you look and who you are, self-esteem also extends into worthiness. Self-worth plays a huge role in your worldview, internal dialogue, mental health, motivation, and self-fulfillment. This also may affect how much effort you put into self-improvement, or how important you think it is that your needs be met.

Unfortunately, about 80% of people will struggle with self-esteem issues at some point in their life. This trend of self-doubt is a huge problem for the well-being of those who suffer. When you have low self-esteem it can feel like a crushing boulder of doubt on your shoulders. You may struggle to feel comfortable expressing yourself or asking for your needs met. You may engage in negative self-talk or other self-destructive behaviors. Low self-esteem is also known to exacerbate depressive and anxious mindsets by feeding into the worry or hopelessness you may feel.

However, high self-esteem is positively associated with better work performance higher rate of promotion and even earning more money. Those who identify as having high self-esteem generally earn an average of $8,000 more a year than those who identify as having low self-esteem. It also might make you more popular around the office, as confidence is rated among the most attractive features for both men and women. Additionally, speaking positively of yourself and others makes you a better friend, and more uplifting to be around which can make you friends as well as provide a lot of value to a team.

Even if you’re not looking for a promotion or new friends, having a more positive view of yourself is great for you. Having positive self-worth can help stave off the more insidious parts of mental illness, and can improve mood, as well as make it easier to live in the moment. It also is a crucial factor in productivity and motivation. Placing more value on yourself means you are more likely to respect the boundaries and goals you set. It is also far more likely you’ll engage in positive or uplifting activities and more easily distance yourself from negative cycles.

Self-esteem is powerful, but it is not a magical cure-all for the problems in your life, even if it does make things easier. Developing your self-esteem can be a challenge, especially in today’s world. With our access to social media and the unrealistic standards that we place on ourselves due to high-pressure work environments, it can be difficult to build up self-esteem. It’s much easier to fall into self-doubt than to continue to lift yourself and herald your achievements no matter how small. Developing a positive self-image takes work and continuous repetition, but we believe that the reward is more than worth it.

If you’re sold on the benefits of developing your self-esteem, you may be asking: how can I begin my self-love journey? We knew you would ask, so we came up with a few tips on how to begin working on developing your esteem.

The first step is to take care of yourself. Make sure you get enough rest, eat meals that will satisfy your body, go outside, move your body, and tidy up your space. One useful visualization technique I employ is caring for your inner child. Imagine yourself when you were young; what did you need? What sort of things did you want to do, or see? Imagine you as an adult are giving to that younger version of yourself all the things that would allow them to thrive. Sometimes imagining your younger self and nurturing them in a way you feel you should have been can be incredibly therapeutic and redemptive. That version of you deserves everything that you do, so it’s important to treat them and you with love, care, and respect.

Once you've met your basic needs it can be helpful to check in with your mental state. Do you feel connected to yourself? Do you feel that you know what you like, dislike, and want? If not, it can be helpful to get clear on who you are, even in small ways. Imagine you are buying a gift for a friend; you might think about the things they like, their favorite color, food, or hobbies. If you cannot do the same for yourself, then you may not be giving yourself the love and attention you deserve. Trust also plays a large role in self-esteem. Seeing yourself as capable can be a challenge, but it’s important to reassure yourself that you will show up. Make a small promise to yourself, and make sure you follow through. When you succeed you reinforce the idea that you are capable and trustworthy. These small successes can add up to big changes in the way you view your ability.

If you find yourself speaking cruelly or negatively about yourself you have to challenge and disarm those thoughts. It’s also important to speak positively to yourself. If you are a flower, the kind words and thoughts you give to yourself will be the fuel that allows you to grow and bloom into the most beautiful and healthy version of yourself that you can be. To develop your self-esteem, it’s important to remind yourself of your worth and value and try to deny the negativity that would say otherwise. This may be a challenge at first, but sometimes it’s okay to fake it until you make it. Try to spend a few minutes a day practicing affirmations of your worth. We came up with a few if you're struggling to find one:

“I am getting better every day”
“My feelings and opinions are unique, and they are important”
“I am doing my best, and that is good enough.”
“I appreciate myself”
“I deserve happiness and peace with myself”
“My future is bright. Success is my birthright.”

Having a support network can be extremely helpful in building your self-esteem as well. Knowing people in your corner who love and support you can help you foster those feelings inside of yourself. Try to spend time with uplifting and supportive friends, or get involved in a group activity for one of your hobbies. If this doesn't work, or you're struggling to begin to develop self-worth, a mental health professional can also help you through talk therapy. Speaking about your struggles with someone you trust can help you release the negative feelings surrounding it.

The final and potentially most helpful tip is to practice gratitude and mindfulness. As I mentioned, building your esteem can sometimes mean appreciating small victories, and accepting where you are. You don't need to be the very best, you only need to be your best. This means you should avoid comparing yourself to others and focus on what you want and take steps each day to achieve it. If you struggle with gratitude, taking the time at the end of the day to reflect can be a great place to start. 

You may find it helpful to journal one thing that you were grateful for that day or make a short list of things you like about yourself or are proud of. You might also benefit from meditation to help generate a sense of peace and connection with yourself. Whichever way you choose to appreciate how far you have come, the more you highlight the positive, the more likely it is to come to the forefront of your mind.

Even when life is difficult, believing in yourself and having faith that you can overcome obstacles can make the harder days a little bit easier. Self-confidence is the key to positive transformation; by creating a tranquil and positive inner landscape can help you transform the world around you. Working to develop self-esteem may be a challenge when you are first starting, but we believe it's worthwhile to continue to tap into the feelings of love that live inside you.